Life-Changing Questions
Who am I? Where am I from? Where do I belong? Why am I here?
Adoptees are faced with questions that touch into the realm of existentialism, philosophy or spirituality. Even though many people on this planet may ask themselves these questions at some point in their lives, adoptees’ journey is intrinsically linked and connected with coming to terms with these questions.
Identity
Given that international adoptees were born with a set of parents in one specific country and asked to grow up with a different set of parents in a different country, they will face the inevitable task of figuring out their identity as they grow up. The culture, language, rituals, traditions, customs, physical appearance of people in both countries may be completely different, and adoptees find themselves in-between trying to figure out where they truly fit and belong.
In my case, born in Peru and raised in Switzerland, I often wondered about this: “Who am I and what makes me who I am? Am I Swiss? Am I Peruvian? Neither? Both? Am I who I am because of my Peruvian DNA or because of the Swiss culture I grew up in?”
We are left with the good-old psychological ‘Nature or Nurture’ question.
People’s Opinions
My attempt to answer my identity questions started by listening to other people telling me who I was. Some people would tell me: “you are Swiss! You were raised here. You have a Swiss passport.” Others insisted: “you are Peruvian! You were born here. It’s in your blood.” And still others told me: “you don’t look Peruvian” or “you are not Latina” even though both my birth parents are from Peru. Everyone had an opinion of who I was or who I wasn’t although none of them were adopted or truly understood what it is like to be adopted.
It took me a while to realize that having other people tell me who I was would not lead me to my own truth.
Personal & Spiritual Development
Starting in my late twenties, I was lucky to encounter people who helped open my mind about personal and spiritual development. I began wondering about the meaning of life, human beings, why we are here on this earth and what we are here to do.
The idea that humans are here to learn, grow and evolve in their lives fascinated me. Learning that there is a bigger meaning to my life brought me much needed hope and light. And finally, understanding that I am a soul in a body having a human experience helped me know myself more deeply.
My Answer Today
Today, I believe that who I am is partly coming from my Peruvian Roots and partly from my upbringing in Switzerland. I often joke that one half of my body is marching like a soldier, humorously representing the structure and discipline I acquired in Switzerland, while the other half is freely dancing, metaphorically representing the vivacity and playfulness in my Latin blood.
On a deeper level, however, I know that my identity fluctuates, changes and evolves. And most importantly, I understand that the essence of who I am goes well beyond where I was born and where I grew up. It goes even beyond my identity as an international adoptee.
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